Feeding the 4/5000 is a “Biblical classic”; the only miracle apart from the resurrection recorded in all four gospels. This was early in Jesus’ ministry, so his popularity was growing rapidly, and the crowds gathered wherever he went. But why in “a remote place”? Matthew supplies a heart-wrenching detail, to explain: John the Baptist had just been executed, and Jesus lost a loved one. Recall the time you dealt with grief. Did you require company or solitude? Jesus seems to have needed the space and quiet to grieve, so he took off in a boat… only to encounter another crowd on the opposite shore! 

Again; here was the multitude that could easily fill Air Canada Centre, all shouting his name, asking to put their needs before his own… and he did, both sorting out their immediate concerns, and anticipating their need for dinner. We, too, all work to heal and feed each other, and occasionally even minister to those who are a bit different from us, exactly as Jesus did. May we learn to recognize the times when we do so, become encouraged by God’s grace helping us through it, and remember those who work for us without us noticing it: farmers, truckers, grocery store workers, restaurant and home chefs. Let us stay thankful for our meals, special and ordinary. 

As for Jesus’ “picnic”, it really was a very ordinary meal by the Galilean standards, of the 1st century and beyond. What about some wine, at least, given its future Eucharistic significance? No; the meal was just bread and fish because that is all that the little boy had (John 6). That’s how God’s grace works in our lives now, unlike how it was “in the beginning”: God doesn’t create out of nothing anymore. Sure, whatever we have is already a gift; but growing and transforming what we have, and only that, is very much a collaboration between us and God. As such, Jesus didn’t make food appear out of thin air, nor did he hand it out by himself, but asked his friends to do it. The disciples, on the other hand, could not give any more than they’d already received from him; but, it’s not like they simply gave their leftovers, either. Quite the opposite: the message seems to be that if we give to others first, then we will all have enough leftovers for breakfast. In a nutshell, this is an illustration of the “divine economy”. So what does each of us bring to God’s picnic? And might serving others, at times, cause us to miss out on something vital for ourselves and our families? 

Understandably, we all worry that this could happen. I’ve spent a  lot of time thinking about the little boy whose meagre portion the disciples took away. I wonder if he was scared and sad, or even if it was a daily occurrence for him, as it certainly is for millions of real-life children today. I resolved to imagine Jesus whispering to him with a wink, “watch this!” to quell his fears, as he took his food. Whenever we feel sad, insecure, or unsafe, may we also hear God’s invitation to watch out for the possibility of a miracle.

But, we do have to watch closely, for the most extraordinary realities are often also quite subtle. We may wish for a miracle to look a certain way, and miss the ones that actually do happen. There was no moment of awe here – no shower of manna. Wouldn’t that have been more impressive? But, exactly as he was trained over the time of his desert temptations, Jesus didn’t care to impress. Instead, he got everyone to sit on the grass, took the boy’s pathetic provision, blessed it, and gave it to his friends to hand out. I bet that many people there didn’t even notice that is was a miracle. And possibly, following Jesus’ example, people simply shared what they had on them, and when redistributed fairly, those resources were, in fact, enough – and that’s what the miracle actually was. Did the disciples recall this years later; perhaps, in the Upper Room, when Jesus asked them to continue breaking their bread together in memory of him? Or, at dinner in Emmaus, when it made them aware of Jesus’ everlasting presence with them through the ordinary act of sharing a meal? We, too, noticed how much sharing food meant to us when the pandemic put a hold on doing so. May we now hang on to the sacramental significance of eating together, at the altar and dinner table. And may we simply enjoy it – accepting the miracle, as Mary Oliver said in her poem – rather than worrying about how to make it happen, or overanalyzing what’s going on.

A bunch of people who do not normally meet due to the diversity of ages, jobs, backgrounds and societal roles; resting, eating, and recalling experiences of God’s healing together. Does this sound familiar? Like church, perhaps? Yes, only God can perform miracles; but, when we help him with our own hands, open to give, and our hearts, open to receive, our shared reality becomes so much more than we “could ask or imagine” on our own.

Food for Thought 🙂

1. Feeding the multitudes appears in all four gospels, even in John, which is really the product of its own unique situation that stands apart from the synoptic gospels (the other three). Sure, the details are a bit different, but they imply similar circumstances. For example, today’s version mentions there was grass available to sit on, so it wasn’t the middle of winter, or summer’s scorching heat – so it was springtime, likely. Another version mentions Passover approaching, again, indicating spring; and another – people traveling, indicating a major feast time. What does this consistency of reporting tell you?
2. Do you feel drawn to be alone “in a remote place” when you are stressed or sad, or do you gain energy from being with people? Based on your temperament, how do you recognize when you are in the best state to serve others, and when it’s time to give yourself permission to recharge – – and how do you do that; what helps you regain energy?
3. Do you think it really works like this, that if we give to others first, as opposed to using our leftovers, we will also, always, be somehow blessed? What about self-care as in Question 2, and “putting an oxygen mask on yourself before helping others”, so to speak?
4. Do you agree that since putting the world’s natural laws into place, and supplying the matter and energy that according to these laws can neither come out of nowhere or dissipate without a trace, God stopped creating “out of nothing”? Is s/he using only/all the resources and creatures already present in the universe?

Logos by Mary Oliver

Why worry about the loaves and fishes?

If you say the right words, the wine expands.

If you say them with love

and the felt ferocity of that love

and the felt necessity of that love,

the fish explode into many.

Imagine him, speaking,

and don’t worry about what is reality,

or what is plain, or what is mysterious.

If you were there, it was all those things.

If you can imagine it, it is all those things.

Eat, drink, be happy.

Accept the miracle.

Accept, too, each spoken word

spoken with love.